Sunday, July 30, 2006

Jodie Sweetin is out to destroy everything I hold dear

A typical romantic evening with my boyfriend involves the following:

1. Mashed Potato Bowls from KFC
2. Wine
3. An episode or two of Fuse's Pants-Off Dance-Off

For those of you who've never caught the show before, visit www.fuse.tv/pants for some clips.

The premise of the show is pretty much summed up by the title. Contestants dance and strip to a song/video of their choice. Viewers are supposed to vote on-line for their favorite dancer.

Now it's all tainted. The new host for the show has been announced, and it's none other than former Meth-head Jodie Sweetin. She won't be stripping or dancing, but I can't say for sure that she'll be completely sober during tapings. Tune in to see!


--an update on the vinyl front:

from Euclid Records:

Travis - The Invisible Band
The Thermals - Fuckin' A
Radiohead - OK Computer
Sufjan Stevens - Illinoise
Huey Lewis and the News - Sports * (for when Miranda visits)
Liza Minelli - Liza With A Z * (replaces previous copy which was unplayable due to a spill)
The Supremes - * I don't remember which album because we have so many effing Supremes records already

* = from the dollar bin

Thursday, July 20, 2006

blackout

Here's a giant branch that landed on our street:

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We don't have power. Our apartment is over ninety degrees up in there.

I hightailed it to New Baden. Swam, ate some pizza and Crazy Bread with the kids:

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Took a little trip to Wal-Mart:

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Best part of the day: finding this drawing --

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Tuesday, July 18, 2006

How much do I love my nieces and nephews?

Tons.

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I've had my cell phone for four months, and I'm just now learning new features:

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Panoramic

Sunday, July 16, 2006

It takes no match to give me a spark.

In the past week, three different people have started conversations with me like this:

"Why aren't you on VH1's World Series of Pop Culture?"

I wish I had an answer, because I swear to Yahweh, if I was on a team with Blood Ray and my sister, I think we could really clean up.

After watching a marathon of the show yesterday, I'm convinced that entering the competition is the easiest way for me to get $250,000. I'd really need to study up on Mob Movies, though.

One category was called "One Hit Wonders," and I was a little bit nervous that they'd ask a question about one of my favorite bands, The Cardigans. It's just weird for me to hear them lumped in the same category with people like Sir Mix-A-Lot and Right Said Fred.

Some people look at me strangely when I mention that I'm in love with The Cardigans.

"Didn't they have that one song on the Romeo And Juliet soundtrack, like, 10 years ago?"

Yes, they did. They've also made three very excellent records since then: Gran Turismo (moody, electronic music), Long Gone Before Daylight (country-ish pop), and Super Extra Gravity (rock). That last one has yet to be released in this country.

I own all of their albums, as well as some DVDs, old bootleg VHS tapes of their shows, and a t-shirt.

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And my ringtone is a song from their current CD, "I Need Some Fine Wine, and You, You Need to be Nicer."

I have not had the chance to see them perform live. And since apparently their CDs aren't being released in the U.S., I thought I never would. I have a list of bands that I love but have never seen live, and The Cardigans are at the very top.

So imagine my surprise when I got a call from Mink telling me they'd be in Chicago at the Metro in September.

Plans were made, tickets were bought, and Lukas and I will be heading up that way in two short months.

Next on my list: Bright Eyes.

Sunday, July 09, 2006

Speaking of religion...

I haven't been to church on a Sunday morning since fifth grade. I've been thinking about religion lately, and I think I've found my answer.

Meet Reverend Alecia:



I'm just going to watch this two-minute clip every week and start praying to ... Yahweh, is it? Feel free to join me. Chair-dancing is optional.

thanks, Val.

Saturday, July 08, 2006

Lost In Emotion

When I was about eight years old, I wanted to use my First Communion money to buy three cassettes at Wal-Mart: Whitney Houston, Madonna, and Lisa Lisa & Cult Jam (featuring Full Force).

My mom, however, decided against it. "I don't want you going around the house singing like a girl."

Let's face it, she probably wanted to say, "I don't want you to grow up gay." She just didn't want to put any ideas in my head.

Anyway, back at Wal-Mart, I pleaded my case.

"But Mom, look at this one! It's Lisa Lisa & Cult Jam! There are two guys standing next to Lisa...Lisa!"

Lisa Lisa

I was forced to buy a shitty walkman instead. I think I had enough money for a Pogo Bal, too.

Pogo Bal

It's no secret that I love female vocalists. And yes, until I was about 21 or so, I focused almost solely on female R&B singers and groups. When I started working after-school jobs, I spent all my money on CDs, tapes, CD singles and cassette singles (also known as "cassingles," although I never called them that). It all makes sense now -- spending every penny on CDs and tapes was my way of rebelling against that incident in Wal-Mart.

So I'm watching VH1 Soul the other night, as I sometimes do, hoping to catch old videos by Patra or Xscape or Zhane. I saw an ad for a new CD collection called Stand Back!

The website says:

Stand Back and let these women do their thing with 30 smash tracks on 2 super-hot CDs!

I say:

Stand Back! is like a custom-made mix of all the songs I listened to in high school and college, on my journey into gayness.

Disc 1

01 Creep | TLC * # ## i
02 Don't Mess With My Man | Nivea feat. Jagged Edge +
03 The First Night | Monica ## i
04 Hit Em Up Style (Oops!) | Blu Cantrell +
05 You're The One | SWV #
06 If You Love Me | Brownstone * ## $
07 My Lovin (You're Never Gonna Get It) | En Vogue ##
08 Don't Think I'm Not | Kandi
09 Every Day of the Week | Jade *
10 Shackles (Praise You) | Mary Mary
11 You're Making Me High | Toni Braxton * ## i
12 Bohemian Rhapsody | The Braids ## @
13 Tell Me | Groove Theory * i
14 The Arms of the One Who Loves You | Xscape **
15 No More (Baby I'ma Do Right) | 3LW +

Disc 2

01 Where My Girls At? | 702 # @
02 Caramel | City High +
03 Move Ya Body | Nina Sky +
04 Groove Thang | Zhane * ##
05 He's Mine | Mokenstef $
06 Make It Hot | Nicole * i
07 G.H.E.T.T.O.U.T. | Changing Faces * i
08 Shoop | Salt N Pepa ##
09 My Love Is the Shhh! | Something For The People *
10 Lately | Divine
11 AM to PM | Christina Milian +
12 Stay | Eternal *
13 Be Careful | Sparkle +
14 Caught Out There | Kelis ## i
15 Secret Love | Kelly Price

* = I owned the cassette single
** = I owned the full-length cassette
# = I owned the CD single
## = I owned the full-length CD
$ - I ordered the video a few times on "The Box"
@ = I made up a dance to this song
+ = I illegally downloaded this song and burned it to a CD
i = this song is currently on my iPod

Stand Back! is available on www.musicspace.com, but if you really want it, I'm sure I could burn a similar mix for you for free. Seriously.

Now I'm 27 years old. I'm gay and live with my boyfriend. I'm no longer a practicing Catholic. And that walkman broke about three weeks after I bought it.

I guess what I'm trying to say is this: Don't deny your young son Lisa Lisa cassettes because you think they might turn him gay. He's gonna turn out gay anyway.

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

it's picture time again

Still recovering from a fun-filled weekend. Miranda and Molly-Rose drove down from Chicago. What better time to throw a party? Homemade mojitos and an on-the-fritz air conditioner almost gave the party a tropical theme, but it was still a good time (if you sat completely still, away from any lighting).

It was also a good opportunity to see the Chihuly exhibit during the daytime. The weekend wound down with some slight Scrabble and craft making.

SATURDAY:

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Scary fish at the Botanical Gardens

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Me and Miranda

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Miranda and Molly-Rose

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ABB in Party Mode

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Kaya makes a new friend

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Me and my girl

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Discussing ringtones, maybe?

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*wink*

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Nice outfits

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Cheers, Sweetpea!

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Buttons I made. (clockwise from top left) Bright Eyes, Natalie Maines, Zach Braff, Regina Spektor, and a young, big-haired Loretta Lynn.


Finally, here's video of a crazy-ass plant that curls up when touched.